general,  Writing

Day 30 of writing Me Here Without You Now

I am writing again! I’ve written three chapters. I’m not doing it chronologically but rather where my inspiration takes me, so, bits first then around it. I have a pretty good idea where the story is going, I know where it ends up (in the beginning), I just need to fill in the missing bits now. I’m trying not to think about what will happen with this book and just write it. I get so caught up with the whole ‘no one will read it, this is stupid, Edie, there are so many books out there, there are real writers out there’ and then I can’t write at all. I’m wondering where this self-doubt is coming from. I know I used to love writing as a girl, they even published some of my stories in the local newspaper when I was younger. Wrote all the articles for our dance group back in the day. Got excellent grades on my essays throughout college. I don’t know. Will have to look into it, into myself.

Nothing new on the teaching front. Have given up on the idea of UX Design or making journals, don’t think that’s for me. Something will come up. It has to.

Found out Sam Heughan has written a book. Well, of course he has! Can’t imagine how easy it must be to publish and market a book when you have like three million followers. I’m taking a wild guess but I’m thinking the book was preordered in millions of copies. It’s a bestseller, of course. I’ll still have to read it, though. Of course! Just for educational purposes. It’s part of my research for writing my first book.

I’ve also bought the first Outlander book and am slowly getting into it. It’s a lot more detailed, a bit much for me. Besides, because I’ve watched the show I keep reading something that was in the show and remembering it from the show or thinking was this in the show. I don’t know. Still, I’m very much into watching the show. Jamie and Claire are in France now and although before they were constantly camping out in the open in Scotland, here they’re part of the upper class and actually meet the king of France. I mean, of course, if I say it like that, it makes no sense but trust me, in the show over the one or two episodes, the transition makes so much sense. Jamie still has PTSD, Claire can’t touch him, he can’t bear it. Don’t know if Claire is bitter about it, I think I would be at this point. But then sex happens inside of a woman’s body, so perhaps we’re just used to being penetrated and it’s that much easier to get over rape than for a heterosexual man who has never been penetrated? Just thinking, here!

I’ve done a bit of research on rape in Middle Ages. Apparently, there was a kind of honour code, so gentlemen did not rape women.

There was a strong emphasis on honor and chivalry in European society during the 17th and 18th centuries, particularly among the upper classes. The concept of honor was closely tied to social status, and it was believed that maintaining one’s honor was essential for upholding one’s reputation and social standing.

The ideal of the “gentleman” was also an important part of this social code. A gentleman was expected to behave with courtesy, respect, and chivalry towards others, especially women. However, it’s important to note that the concept of the gentleman was often limited to the upper classes and did not necessarily apply to all men.

On the other hand apparently Aquinas considered masturbation a greater sin than rape, because rape can still lead to conception whereas masturbation cannot. Will look into it more, I seriously don’t think rape was something this casual or that men raped women so often. If it was, I am utterly disappointed in men and the world.

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